The dog's breakfast you describe may be what you would want to see. Personally, I'd rather watch paint dry while having bamboo slivers shoved under my fingernails.

And this highly competitive hockey tournament we've just watched, among the world's best playing at their peak performance level, is not in any way compatible the throwaway NFL Pro Bowl game. Even to suggest so is insulting.

Perhaps you should try to find a better analogy, or dream up a more appealing scenario -- that is, if you want to be taken seriously.