A man and his wife were spending the day at the zoo.
She was wearing a loose fitting, pink dress, sleeveless with straps.
He was wearing his usual jeans and T-shirt.
As they walked through the ape exhibit, they passed in front of a large, silverback gorilla. Noticing the wife, the gorilla went crazy. He jumped on the bars, and holding on with one hand and 2 feet he grunted and pounded his chest with his free hand.
He was obviously excited at the pretty lady in the pink Dress.
The husband, noticing the excitement, thought this was funny. He suggested that his wife tease the poor fellow some more by puckering her lips and wiggling her bottom. She played along and the gorilla got even more excited, making noises that would wake the dead. Then the husband suggested that she let one of her straps fall to show a little more skin. She did... And the gorilla was about to tear the bars down.
"Now... Show your thighs and sort of fan your dress at him," he said. This drove the gorilla absolutely crazy, and he started doing flips.
Then the husband grabbed his wife, ripped open the door to the cage, flung her in with the gorilla and slammed the cage door shut.
The blonde jokes are acceptable though, right? Sounds pretty hypocritical.
No, they are not. And speaking for myself, my objections to this kind of stuff are not based on the poster (I don't care WHO posts this kind of crap), but on the misogyny displayed. It's ugly no matter WHO posts it. But, then, if you don't get it, I guess you just don't get it. Pity.
And will you be sitting in the front pew of your Church Sunday morning ?You hypocritical jackass ? Get a life,try and let a little humor in while you still have time, as a so called educator you don't impress me. The we you speak of hardly represents the majority apparently
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I doubt that you would ever be impressed by any educator. But we can always count on you to applaud questionable taste, and puerile sophomoric humor. The "majority" is too fed up with a small minority here to even bother replying to them most of the time.
Wonder why no ladies have responded to set the knuckle draggers straight. Imagine the horror of being emotionally shackled to one of these clueless mouth breathers for the duration, never mind having to periodically appear in public with him.
QUOTE: Wonder why no ladies have responded to set the knuckle draggers straight. Imagine the horror of being emotionally shackled to one of these clueless mouth breathers for the duration, never mind having to periodically appear in public with him.
You and others may pin all the labels you choose on me . And name callings and insults, I have been married to the same woman for 50 + years,and have as much ,or more respect for women than most men I know, now how long have you been married ? and to how many women?or perhaps men,now days it's hard to tell.Perhaps the women that post here have a bit more humor than you and others, and also ,it would appear to me that if they were offended,I think they would have responded . And do come up with some more derogatory remarks ,the Ed Greene Knuckle draggers,and the Don Imus mouth breathers ,are old ,and certainly are indicative of a lack of integrity on the part of those that choose to use the terminology.
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You correct nothing, and why such a delay in your alleged disgust? and who are the we you refer To? The only disgust I detect here is ,go along to get along. very funny
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Poor Bob... Although I didn't specify you by name, you certainly were quick to relate to the profile.
And I've been married at least (hmm... let me think...) yeah, twelve times. And each time it was to a woman -- I'm pretty sure, at least -- because there was that one who could never really explain away the beard and mustache. But that's a story for another day.
Yeah, twelve times. And if you don't believe me, I can lead you to where I buried the bodies. Although I think they built a condo on one the sites, so you'd have to take my word for that one.
I am also at a loss as to how I am hypocritical...
Perhaps it is because I don't recall you being so objective to any other jokes posted here, that were in my opinion, far more offensive your inconsistency is showing.
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Well, I can honestly say that some offfensive jokes may have passed me by. In some cases I may have not wanted to stir up a hornets nest. I was disgusted by this joke when I initially read it, but decided not to comment. After Larry and Shelly commented and were opposed by you I felt that I should throw in my 2 cents.
I can also say that I do not read many of the joke threads posted. Ian regularly posts a number of jokes. Sometimes I read a few, sometimes I read none, I have never read all of them.
If you would like I can start reading all the jokes and commenting on which ones I think are offensive...
Author JohnnyReb Author Info Member since Oct 04th 2002 920 posts Date Fri Mar-16-07 06:11 PM Message
In response to fishstick (In response to 0)
Three blondes have been drinking at the bar. They order round after round of shots, hold their glasses up, shout "73 days!" and then down the drinks.
After about 8 rounds of this, the bartender's curiosity overwhelms him. He walks over to the women and asks what "73 days" means.
One of the blondes proudly replies "We have been doing a puzzle. We finished it today, after only 73 days. Despite the fact that the box says 3 - 5 years!"
Remember? And you pile on after Shelley and Larry posted? Read Larry's post #20 and you'll see he doesn't agree with the blonde jokes either.
Of course you wouldn't make any comment on blonde jokes, you post your own!
I'm also convinced if anybody else instead of me had posted that joke, it would have rolled down the board with little or no negative comment. Not the circus it's turned into.
Guess it's time for me to throw in my 2 cents for what it's worth.
Being a lady of the forum I have to differ with Noreen. I have to honestly say I was NOT offended by the joke whatsoever. I will say I didn't find it to carry much humor but there are many jokes out there that I don't find funny. It takes a really good (cute) joke to get a laugh out of me.
With that being said, I read the joke and thought of it as just that, a joke! If you start nit-picking the jokes apart that have been posted in this forum you have some work ahead of you. There are plenty of jokes that I'm sure each of us can find some sort of fault within, and some that you may be offended by but truthfully were do you draw the line?
I found more humor, and disgust I might add, in the fact that you all were now bickering over a darn joke that had been posted. If you didn't care for the joke, so what, go to the next thread. How simple is that?
I find it amazing how much arguing is done amongst forum members here. *sigh* It seems to me when you are bickering over a joke that you are really just trying to find something to gripe about.
Lighten up and enjoy life.... whatever happen to the old saying that I remember hearing my father say so often, "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." This forum would be a much more pleasant place if we could all follow that bit of advice a little better.
I think as long as I have been around some of you know that I usually don't express myself with topics such as these. I looked at this thread yesterday and yet this morning you all are still carrying on about the joke. Go find something productive to do or enjoy the beautiful outdoors and Mother Nature... you'll find this much more refreshing.
On that note I'm out of here to do just that, hope you all have a wonderful day.
Oh yes, and I've never been known for short post.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"A woman's heart is an ocean of secrets." Rose Dawson; from the movie "Titanic"
Maybe, a bit... But look at the retrograde bunch of fat-bellied chauvinistic old reprobates and young Archie Bunker wannabes you have agreeing with you. You've probably set back women's rights by at least a half-century.
Your opinion may differ from others, but to insult those that disagree with you shows a lot about your character. And the same goes for the others who continue to try and belittle those with a different opinion. For Petes sake,are we back in grade school. To try and prove you are more intellectual and mature,only shows you have a self-esteem problem. I know myself and others wont even post here in the off-topic due to the constant nit picking and the so called politically correct attitudes that a few of you have. I admit the joke borders on the distasteful side,but it was a joke. Its not about women,its about a wife. To be offended only means your sense of humour is lacking. And James,this isnt directed directly at you,its to all who fit the bill. Of course then again,maybe you all like this sort of "I'm better than you are" game.Who knows.
#47. "RE: A DAY AT THE ZOO" In response to troy614 (Reply # 46) Sun Jun-24-07 11:26 PM by jazz4free
Quote:
...your sense of humour is lacking.
Ahem? Excuse me...
My tone in that post, quite obviously, was tongue planted firmly in cheek. I was trying to poke a little fun, ergo the smiley.
Quote:
To try and prove you are more intellectual and mature,only shows you have a self-esteem problem. I know myself and others wont even post here in the off-topic due to the constant nit picking and the so called politically correct attitudes that a few of you have.
As far as having a problem with my self esteem, you may well be right -- but aren't we all a little shaky where that is concerned.
I'm sorry that you and some unidentified others feel uncomfortable about posting here, but I'm almost certain if you come here only to socialize, you need have no fear of being nit-picked and assaulted. I, for one, haven't beaten up on anybody lately because they were exchanging birthday greetings, weather reports or gas prices, or asking advice on how to dig a post hole. On the other hand, if you come here to discuss politics or religion or world affairs or immigration or gun control or universal health care, etc., etc., you will run into people who have strong feelings and who are not shy about expressing them.
And what you describe as a politically correct attitude I prefer to think of as an intolerance for ignorance and the bigotry it breeds.
And I haven't yet commented, one way or the other, on the "joke" that got all this going, but I agree that it was misogynist, juvenile and vile, and, what's even worse, unfunny.
QUOTE: Not sure if that wasa joke or not, but Kiwi is the traitor. She defected to Bitbenders some time ago. But it's ok we got troy now!
Now that did give me the laugh of the day! If you'd pay more attention to the darn stats you would see I'm now back and have been for a month or so!! *winks*
I followed Troy here!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"A woman's heart is an ocean of secrets." Rose Dawson; from the movie "Titanic"
Wow! I was thinking we had enough “nays” that I could have jumped in with mine. But now your illuminating presentation has left me befuddled more so than before. So just to be on the safe side, my opinion for now will remain as naught.
Thanks for posting that link Jim. Maybe people weren't as politically correct 4 years ago and that is why they ripped into me after my posting of that joke. Nah...Sorry, I don't believe that.
Actually, on further thought you may have a point. It may very well be that this joke would have gone by without a comment if you hadn't posted it.
I would like to think not, but it is quite possible. I think some people are fed up with your juvenile antics, and will post a response to almost anything you post, just because of that. If you grow up a little, maybe you won't receive the amount of criticism that you do now...
#61. "RE: A DAY AT THE ZOO" In response to JohnnyReb (Reply # 59) Mon Jun-25-07 10:12 AM by giseuda
Quote:
Actually, on further thought you may have a point. It may very well be that this joke would have gone by without a comment if you hadn't posted it.
I would like to think not, but it is quite possible. I think some people are fed up with your juvenile antics, and will post a response to almost anything you post, just because of that. If you grow up a little, maybe you won't receive the amount of criticism that you do now...
Now the real truth is coming out.
As far as the criticism is concerned coming from you elitist hypocrites, from Humphrey Bogart... "Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn"
Edit: I think the actor that said that is probably wrong. Oh well, something else to rip into me for. I'm use to it.
I'm not sure what any of that "record" means. Just because we were members at the time doesn't mean that we check the forum everyday and read every single post. I for one usually skip right over a post when I find out it's a joke post. I only read this one because I wanted to see what was so "vile".
Maybe we all read it then and found no reason to comment on it, but now everyone does? Who knows.
Or possibly the thread never got this big then because flmcg wasn't here to call it vile.
And Ianw was the person who posted this joke originally 4 years ago.
Sometimes you can be so dense. Even giseuda understood my point. See his reply #58.
Go back and read the post I replied to (6) and the post it was in response to (#5).
There's no way of knowing who read the earlier posting unless they replied to it. So what? That doesn't alter the reality that the "joke" was posted previously and that no one took umbrage at it.
Quote:
And Ianw was the person who posted this joke originally 4 years ago.
If you have a link to backup your claim, please provide it. He was not the member who posted it in the link I provided.
Well, I am not sure Adam is being that dense here. Larry posted the initial response, and he was not a member four years ago. I never even read the OT forum until about two years ago (my first OT post was in Sept. 2005), and my post helped to get the whole ball rolling.
So it is conceivable that the same reaction would have arisen if the same characters had read the post then.
BUT Gisueda may be right that it was the fact that HE posted it that ensured that the rezaction would be posted and not just thought.
Larry posted the initial response, and he was not a member four years ago.
Although I don't know him well enough to call him "Larry" , I did say he wasn't a member 4 years ago
Quote:
4. With the exception of jazz4free, Ianw, and flmcg, everyone who has posted to this topic was a forum member at the time of the earlier posting.
My reply to you was in no way a criticism of you personally. Your post was a convenient place to post to, that's all. Hell, I didn't take offense to the earlier posting either - perhaps I should have, but I didn't.
Now, so you're saying that just because no one commented on the post 4 years ago that nobody was offended then?
What do you mean I'm dense?! Now I get a chance to say to you re-read my post!! Your "record" post means nothing. You of all people should know (because you have an uncanny memory about posts) that some things get posted several times all with varied replies, some with no replies.
Maybe some people only frequent certain forums? Or, like I said, who's to say we were even reading the forum then? I for one don't look past the first page, and once a thread goes to the second, I'll never see it.
I'm just saying there are too many factors about why, when and who posts before suggesting that this umbrage happened because of the person who posted it.
Dense is, when giseuda gets the point of a reply and you don't.
Quote:
I'm just saying there are too many factors about why, when and who posts before suggesting that this umbrage happened because of the person who posted it.
Dense is, when giseuda gets the point of a reply and you don't
I got what you were saying!! I'm telling you it's crap!! There's just too many possibilities. What Gideuda is saying in 58 means nothing. You're telling him what he wants to hear.
Post 59 is a theory. Too many factors.
Can we change the subject now to something else? We need to get this meaningless thread to 100 posts!! By the end of day.
I got what you were saying!! I'm telling you it's crap!!
OK, here's your big chance. Tell me what part of what I wrote is "crap". With the exception of Ianw being faceache, tell me which of my 5 statements is not factual.
Quote:
For the record:
1. This "joke" was previously posted.
2. I didn't post it or respond to it.
3. It didn't engender the response this thread has.
4. With the exception of jazz4free, Ianw, and flmcg, everyone who has posted to this topic was a forum member at the time of the earlier posting.
5. No one who has posted to this thread posted to the earlier thread.
To save you time, let me tell you that it's your conclusions and interpretation of what I wrote that's crap.
perhaps choice and the thought of something enticing could save time and Exedrin.
.........
i also thought the "joke" disgusting. three people being so dumb they misunderstand simple directions is amusing (tho i wouldn't want to live with them.) throwing a trusting loved one into a situation of pain, wounds and degradation for the sake of retribution is definitely not funny.
i read this yesterday when there were no replies and i made none. as has been stated, people don't reply to every disagreeable post they see. sorry i haven't been back til now to state my opinion.
BIG OT (apologies extended): hi, jan! hi, troy! very glad to see you on this side of the pond again! Hank here is too old and feeble to BOINC, so we are going to search for another grid project. i'm sure you heard our work for the grid cancer project is finished. someday, when the stars are in the right alignment, i will sit down and order a new puter. til then, right on, crunchers!
Hank is so old (11/19/1999), he already has all the memory he was ever wired for. i don't know what else could bring him up to speed, if anything.
i keep saying i am going to get a new puter, but since i got this place about a year ago, and what with life throwing in a few monkey wrenches, i haven't had the time to devote to looking for one, and not much incentive since Hank's still running. well, maybe not running, exactly, but he's still in the race.
BIG OT (apologies extended): hi, jan! hi, troy! very glad to see you on this side of the pond again! Hank here is too old and feeble to BOINC, so we are going to search for another grid project. i'm sure you heard our work for the grid cancer project is finished. someday, when the stars are in the right alignment, i will sit down and order a new puter. til then, right on, crunchers!
Hi Sophie! I noticed the bronze statue of you in the basement and thought how fitting You have given a lot to the cause for years.I personally consider you a lifetime teammate,even without Hank. Hope to see you stirring things up in the dungeon soon.
#90. "RE: A DAY AT THE ZOO" In response to giseuda (Reply # 0) Mon Jun-25-07 05:01 PM by _Chewy_
I have to say this is the most pathetic thread ever in our forum's history. But quite typical of our dysfunctional family at PCQ&A - I definitely got a good chuckle out of it.
(And yes we all know Guiseda is nothing but a troll).
"Dysfunctional" - are you kidding? We are pretty much the stereotypical nuclear family...
Shelly is the father with sage advice and not a little bit of discipline. James is the older brother combining wisdom and brutal violence to exercise his control over the siblings. Gisueda and BobW are the twin little boys who strive for attention by causing trouble. Jan is the mom - always ready with a little apple pie and sweet advice. Jim is the good-natured uncle. The rest of you can place yourselves wherever you want...
This reply is not directed at anyone. ---------------------------------------
I'll tell you what vile is.
I went into the Firefox forum around the start of this year. I noticed a post with links to other websites but the urls did not betray what the sites were about.
there were still images of scenes of videos being made of raping women. Raping is putting it mildly, sickening, obnoxious. there was a woman of around 25 kneeling naked on the floor with blood running down her face out of her mouth due to whatever the scum done to her.
I'll not describe the others. I did not look into the other websites, but I notified the mods who deleted them right away.
Before I retired I met up with a local resident who lived nearby where I worked. He worked for the customs people, he told me of one part of their jobes when they have to view Video's that were seized.
After a week of that they had to take a week off to recover. What did they see, limbs being cut off babies who were alive and other things.
Do you get the picture. I am not describing any more of it, sickening isn't the word for it. The perpetrators should have their privates hacked off then stuffed down their throats then given extreme pain then hung.
-------------------------------- And yes, I posted that joke a few years ago with not one word said against it.
-------------------------------------- I had some words with my wife, she had some paragraphs with me.
? Why? because the 2 little twin boys retaliate to the being sent their way.Or perhaps you just don't have a concept of fun.Ah yes what a glorious place this would be ,but for the trouble makers ,Gisueda and Bobw. to the sanctimonious jackasses.
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Everyone must recall an incident similar to this: We were kids playing a street game of tossing a ball back and forth, and the ball innocently strayed into the yard of the house on the block where the curtains were always drawn. And the mean old man who lived in that house came out and stole the ball because in his musty old misery he just couldn't stand the sight and sound of children playing and having fun.
QUOTE:Jan is the mom - always ready with a little apple pie and sweet advice.
Oh goodness, this gets funnier by the moment!
Hey Johnny, thank you but no thank you. This girl does NOT want to be "mom", no way! I have my hands full with my own juveniles running around here in real life trying to control them, and believe me it's not easy!
I appreciate the compliment but have to pass. *winks*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"A woman's heart is an ocean of secrets." Rose Dawson; from the movie "Titanic"
No, no, no, how many times do I have to tell you -- that's bathroom wall defacing. Now eat your brocolli, little bro, or you'll grow up to be like your other two brothers. The annoying ones who come to visit when their meds kick in and they are let out on a day pass.
*winks* 
to keep Troy in line! 
Hey Johnny, thank you but no thank you. This girl does NOT want to be "mom", no way! I have my hands full with my own juveniles running around here in real life trying to control them, and believe me it's not easy! 
No, no, no, how many times do I have to tell you -- that's bathroom wall defacing. Now eat your brocolli, little bro, or you'll grow up to be like your other two brothers. The annoying ones who come to visit when their meds kick in and they are let out on a day pass.